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If Only

by Brad Bordessa

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Intro 00:18
Corners 03:50
“That’s the take, Sarah” said the boys from the control room Convinced that they just tracked the next big thing A star she’d make, but she was a fake, high on Melodyne But that didn’t matter; the label would give her wings Jimmy and Jane made four months with a baby on the table Dealt the cards of a one night, cheatin’ stand “We’ll name him Paul,” and that was all fine, but she often wondered One less drink and would she have played her hand She’ll never know But now she tells her baby son Chorus: Don’t you straighten the corners Life gets lost as the crow flies Destiny tries to warn you So don’t put her last and pass her by “These are the lies you’ll live with!” screamed the oil runner’s daughter “You can’t put back what was never yours to take!” In time he’ll find that the land he mined could better have served as forest But for now he bows to Exxon and their stakes Mother culture, whispering in my ear saying “Don’t leave this path I’ve brought you on” “You might not make it back in time” Well, mother I can find my way The long road’s fine You can take back all your fear
Fallout 04:24
Madi’s grandson grew up in a graveyard But still the house felt like home Beneath the concrete, a mass burial 10 feet deep He hears the voices when he’s alone “Grandma can hear them too? The boys say that I’m crazy” She says “No, but I can tell you their names” They were, they were urban angels The rebels who challenged the throne They were, they were our best chance Until the silos cracked and the city glowed “So that’s why you’re sick – the fallout crippled you” His gas mask fogged is he cried “I feel helpless, but knowing this I could never rest” “Tell me more of the lie” She turns her wheelchair and looks out on the desert And says “No, this is not a child’s game” “I can’t believe they would level a whole city, Grandma how did you survive?” “There were nine of us,” she said “who made it to the shelter and we locked ourselves inside” “But if I could do it all again I would,” and a fire burned in her eyes
Bulletproof 03:31
Look towards the crowd Can’t you see her she’s wearing The high lace up boots and the big hoop earrings Black lipstick says upfront “speak on the dark side” But with eyes like that in the light you’ll stay If you see her you’d be wise to tread lightly She made up her mind yesterday Chorus: Soon she will find that what she had in mind Will slow down her search for the perfectly aligned In her plans a quick trip to Japan Will make sure that her friends will be worried when she goes missing She’s fed up and sick of everything mainstream Her personal redlist is 13 feet long Just last week she killed with a sentence A man rumored to have had nothing to say If you see her you’d be wise to speak lightly She made up her mind yesterday Bridge: Holding back the hate is bulletproof glass though it is flawed How long till it breaks? She doesn’t want to find out That’s why she should’ve left yesterday Look towards the crowd You can’t miss her she’s perfect Perfectly crazy about no one who gets in her way…
+dB 03:12
Reason 04:01
Hasn’t event been one month Don’t even know her sister’s name Think too hard I can’t even see her face, but I could That’s the reason for the empty frame There’s that look again A whole future stretched out at the sight I don’t know where that smile has been, but I could Question is: do I want it in my life? Two moments in time Passing by Chorus: When you read between the lines There might be four letters you’re not to see Only the writer knows the truth And holds the key How many times have we all been here before All alone in an answerless place Don’t know what I want from love, but I could Given there’s a God and a change of pace
Silent Segue 00:54
Silence. Silence is your only friend.
Atlas 04:10
Raise your hand Feel the gravity Of this time A life you must lead There are no exits Just one way forward Let’s be clear This isn’t sympathy But a call Generationally Alone we each are angry figures At our weakest But find a way to link together And the puzzle reaches Chorus: Cherish the weight of the world Shoulders frozen You have been chosen to see this through Stronger by far in numbers We are Atlas Meet my crew Revolutionaries This is what they do Their protests a masterpiece Ask me and I couldn’t tell you Their names But I know that they are here with me Just the same
Take your mind away just for a moment Leave the rat race in the street Walk a mile in the shoes of your shadow There in the darkness, a heart beats In this time of the constant memory Keep in mind there are no new thoughts to think 10,000 years or more of conscious Of what waters didn’t your elders drink? So why numb the senses by plugging in Introduce yourselves to the monsters that Live beneath your skin And remember… they. are. you. Who’s to say there’s not a channel Opened only in the moments behind a blink Split-second years that the eyes think they don’t see Light is darkness of varying strengths
Tonight, she’s part of the problem That no one else is willing to solve It’s time someone did something And she’s ready to take the fall There are lies and there are destroyers Intended to break a mind When both come for her brother She learns just how fast fate binds There’s only so much a young mind can take Before the walls of home close in Chorus: Sisters got a gun There’s no stopping now Look out your window and see her running you down Sister’s got a gun I hope you’re fleeing now But if a bullet finds you no one would cry anyhow “Dear dad, you let this happen…” Starts the letter she could never send Plain words feel empty When facing a family’s end There’s only so much that a letter can say When a parent lets the demons in Bridge: All pain does end But how you get there is up to you Resentment is bred by inaction in face of the truth It’s a little too late for remorse
If Only 04:36
Lately I’m of just one mind And it lingers on A pair of eyes and a smile Took time to find my way True North broke free Now my compass forever seeks you There’s beauty in a mystery Like holding hands in the dark But a part of me wants to explain it Thoughts die on my lips Chorus: If only words did it justice Then I might attempt to say That this is love, love we might find our way If only words that it justice Then I wouldn’t need this song Because you would know my mind and I would never speak wrong So why do I waste my time When every word fall short? This is my only way of coping Maybe with a melody These lines can take the place Of a tongue tied up around you


Recorded & Mixed at: Behind A Mattress Studios in Ahualoa, HI from September 2016 - March 2017 by Brad Bordessa
Additional recording at: Bigger Kid Studios, Kamuela, HI; Crystal Lake Studios, Nova Scotia, Canada; and Ryno Studio, Pa'auilo, HI
Mastered at: Archive Mastering by J. LaPointe
All songs written, arranged, and produced by Brad Bordessa


released June 1, 2017

Brad Bordessa - Vox, 'Ukulele, Guitar, Bass, Steel Guitar, Banjo, Claps
Noa Eads - Drums
Ryan “Higgs” Higgins - Backup Vox on "Atlas"
James Hill - String Arrangement on "If Only"
Alan Ku - Bass and Guitar on "Sister’s Got A Gun"
Jeff Quin - Electric Violin on "Fallout"

Evan Bordessa - Photography
Alicia Greenwell - Artwork


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Brad Bordessa Honokaa, Hawaii

'Ukulele in Hawai'i? You think plastic leis and palm trees. Brad thinks full-spectrum musical expression. Welcome to the party.

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